Someone Looking At The Sun On The Horizon

2021 #Resolutions What Goals Will You Be Working On?

This year has been brutal.

Looking back there have been highs, but the lows have been heart breaking. 

Work.

Money.

Health.

Where have you felt the impact of 2020?

The New Year won’t be a repeat of the last. I will be making some changes in 2021. Perhaps you will too?

If so, feel free to fill in the short survey below, say what you plan on changing and as a result influence the type of content which I create.

What Do Want From 2021?

I am looking forward to reading about your goals.

Meanwhile, Have a Great Christmas / Holiday Season and a Peaceful New Year. 

(Photo credit Joshua Earle on Unsplash )

What Difference Does #Happiness Make?

Happiness Involves Doing What You Love With And For Others – Photo by RUN 4 FFWPU from Pexels

So, what was the highlight of your month?  For me it was last weekend. In 48 hours I met several goals, including getting to see some friends, catching up with family and spending time on my own stuff. I am grateful that I was able to spend my time in this way.

Looking back at your month, how much time did you get to spend happily doing what you wanted?

Did you get to spend enough time seeing people you love and meeting your needs?

Or did work overwhelm everything?

Would you score yourself above 6 out of 10 on the happiness scale?

If we live to our mid 70s we will have spent more than 27,000 days on Earth! If we are too busy running from Point A to Point B to be happy in that time we are doing ourselves a disservice. So what conscious step will we need to take today, to make ourselves a little happier?

 

5 Tools For #Success In Tough Times

How Do You Start Moving Towards Success? Photo by rawpixel.com from Pexels

Wow, it is almost the start of June and there are 215 days left until the new year.

There is no way I can predict what will happen between now and then, any more than I could have anticipated what I have had to deal with so far in 2019 (the list includes bereavement, bureaucracy and building new relationships).
Having said that I have found the following 5 points to be important in achieving success with my goals even in tough times (I hope you find them useful too):
  • Openness – being prepared to ask for help before being overcome by feelings of overwhelm.
  • Sharing – letting others know what is happening and what it is teaching you.
  • Listening – I have found paying close attention to what people are saying, beyond the words they are using, has been very helpful.
  • Humour – this can be difficult, but finding the lighter side of a dark situation can help with keeping things in perspective.
  • Forgiveness – we all make mistakes and no one is perfect. Getting hung up on the harm others have caused us reduces the time we can spend making a positive contribution to the world.
What are your top 5 success tools? Which one do you go to most often? Feel free to Like or Share if this post has struck a chord.

The 7 Key Lessons About Service I’ve Taken From #NHS70

 

7 Principles Behind Great Service – Picture from Pexels.com

I’ve spent a lot of time recently in the company of nurses, physiotherapists, doctors and other NHS (national health service) professionals. They are in the business of service delivery. Their customers are very demanding (if our own health or that of a loved one is in question we won’t always be reasonable in what we want). They are passionate about the quality of the work they deliver.

In my experience the professionals in the NHS mostly produce the right results at the right time. So, on the 70th birthday of the NHS here are 7 points we can take away from what health care staff do well day after day:

Assertion

Saying clearly what needs to happen next and asking for cooperation to bring it about.

Boundaries

Knowing when to say ‘no’, because a different action will produce a better result.

Care

It helps everyone to know what kind of result the person receiving the service is looking for, then it becomes easier to tailor work to achieve that outcome (and care about the progress towards that goal)   

Decisiveness

Keeping in touch with the boundaries involved and going to find help when we are out of our depth (without thinking too much about how it will make us look).

Ego

We all achieve better results when we are thinking and acting in others’ interests, without ego getting in the way.

Faith

Believing that colleagues and the other people in our network can achieve great results in unfamiliar areas.

Generosity

Remembering to say ‘thank you’ for the service you receive that helps you achieve more and feel better.

What Do You Think Good Service Looks Like?

These are my ideas about the basics behind the delivery of great services. If you have experienced impressive service who was responsible for providing it? What did they do to make things go well? How did you let them know you were pleased?

Feel free to Like and Share this post of it has been helpful to you.

 

All the best

Roger

Have You Tried These 3 Steps To Greater #Success When You Work On Your #Goals ?

Man Exercising Outside

Whatever Your Goal You Will Get Better Results Everyday – Original Image From Pexels.Com

You can take steps to start changing your life at any time, but plenty of people get going at the start of the New Year.

So, if you want to be a new man (or woman) this year here are 3 steps to take towards greater success as you pursue and attain your goals:

Agility

Start by sitting down with a piece of paper and a pen to work out what you will gain when you pay attention to your health, wealth or career goals.

Then become more agile in the way you move forward. Be clear in your mind and on paper what success looks like. Are you feeling successful when you reach your first milestone? If your first step has not worked out change approach. Be agile. Take another step in a different direction.

Bravery

Most people are not pursuing big goals. Most people are getting by. Having a bigger goal and working on it everyday means stepping out of the mainstream.

That’s a brave thing to do.

Doing something differently will create a boundary between the people who like the old you and those who want to see the new you emerge. How will you manage your feelings when you meet people who just don’t get what you are doing, or why you are doing it? Who will you get support from as you change?

Is there a local network of well motivated and goal-oriented people you can tap into? How would you feel about creating one if necessary?

Collaboration 

You will now have access to a group of buddies you can share your successes with, as they are also doing their personal development work and they get what you are going through.

You care about their progress just as much as they care about yours. Be your charming, collaborative self and be prepared to help others with their achievements. Those connections will help you open doors in future.

Your Next Step

What is your next big goal? What will you gain once you start working on it? How could an ABC approach help you get results?

Why not use the Comment section to share your motivation for taking action to help yourself. If you want to look at a few ‘How To’ ideas as you plan your next steps you can download a free ABC guide via this link https://experienceyourlife.me/members-access/   If you want to discuss your support needs you can schedule a conversation there too.

Keep an eye out for the next post, which will help you get more success from your goals this year.

How To Take One Small Step Towards A Happier New Year

Astronaut Spacewalk Extra Vehicular Activity

What Giant Leap Will You Make By Acting On Your Goal? Image From Pexels.Com

For a while, when I was little, I wanted to be an astronaut.

With hindsight that idea said a lot about escapism (home life wasn’t always ideal to be honest). From what I can remember though I thought being a spaceman would be a pretty cool job. I mean how difficult could it be to live in a spaceship, with nothing holding you down, doing science stuff indoors and outside that helped people?

Turns out the science stuff and helping people isn’t that easy, as people have baggage and getting a good result has an impact on a lot of other people.

Teamwork

I definitely didn’t realise how much people rely on each other to make plans turn into reality. a long list of other people made it possible for the astronaut to do their thing.

For instance I didn’t know how crowded an astronaut’s life is: it took more than Tim Peake and the other 2 people in the Soyuz capsule to get the latest crew onto the International Space Station.

When the computers plotting the capsule’s approach to the ISS got the final stage wrong it was US astronaut Tim Kopra who passed manual docking control to Russian Commander Yuri Malenchenko, while ground controllers at Russia’s Mission Control Centre monitored developments and the ISS crew held their breath.

It took 3 attempts. Working together the team of astronauts got the job done (collaboration helps during spacewalks too). No lone heroics, just great teamwork. Overcoming difficulties usually depends on one person being open enough to say ‘I can’t do this on my own’ and to ask another person for help.

Mission Control We Have A Problem

So here is the thing, people can hold on to their difficulty for quite a while before looking for someone with whom to connect (ask any coach about building trusting relationships which offer others support ). Imagine holding on to a burden for months, years, or decades even. What kind of toll would that take?

Now imagine being able to flow freely, without that burdensome weight getting in the way. How much more could you accomplish for others? How much easier would your own life be? 

The skilful coach understands others’ obvious and subtle needs (they might say they need clarity about their next step during an overwhelming period at work to start with. They might also be open to receiving support at a deeper level, so they can reduce the stress in their personal relationship)

Are you ready to get the support you deserve?

One Small Step

In a month, as part of my mission for the new year, I will support some people to take a small step toward a freer flowing 2016. My workshop in London on 23 January will help those ready to take one small step to turn their career, life, or wellbeing resolutions into reality*.

Use the Comment section to share your big goal for the new year (or get in touch via Twitter @RogerD_Said ). Also keep an eye out for updates, as I will share a few of the strategies I am going to use, ahead of time.

Meanwhile, wherever on Earth (or above it) you happen to spend the day have a very Happy Christmas.   

One Giant Leap

*Hit the link below if you would like to know more about the 23 January event in London. Book a seat and join others helping to turn their goals into reality

https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/turn-your-resolution-into-reality-now-tickets-20034420491

Are You OK Mate? 3 Ways In Which Receiving Support Lifts Your Mood

Road Signs Showing Men Working

Men At Work From Morguefile.com

Here is a sobering statistic.

This year 75% of people in the UK taking their own life will be men.

That is 3 men for every 1 woman.

Strong And Silent

Generally men in mid-life say ‘Yes’ if you ask ‘Are you OK?’

It is best to be strong and silent. Man up. Keep working. Or get wasted. Or withdraw.

Tears are best kept for football. That’s a crying shame.

Those 40 somethings are the ones at greater risk.

Potential To Grow

I am lucky enough to have supported some men working through their personal development goals (and received support myself).

It seems obvious that men’s actual inner state can be weighing them down while outwardly there are no signs of distress.

Behind the facade there can be turmoil. Turmoil does not lead directly to self harm. It doesn’t help though.

Life is better with fewer obstacles to growth. It is hard to believe that you can grow if you don’t feel like you can exercise leadership in your own life.

What Could Men Learn From Women?

As a rule women will look for and find support. Women talk about their stuff, where guys will keep their hurt to themselves.

Maybe part of masculinity is being open to help?

Benefits Of Being Listened To

Today seems like a good day to start talking about the benefits of receiving help if you are carrying a heavy burden.

In my experience being listened to deeply can be an intense experience. It changes things. It is a big victory for some guys to take action on their goals.

Here Are 3 Ways Guys Initially Benefit From Support

They experience

  • caring help as they set priorities
  • more confidence as they tackle priorities and move past long standing blockages
  • fewer burdens and more happiness

After their confidence increases it becomes easier to keep moving forward. Doors keep opening once they practice their action-based skills.

Share This Information

Thanks for reading this post. Comment below if these ideas have struck a chord with you. Use Twitter @RogerD_Said if you perfer.

If you are sharing the post with your followers on Twitter you can use the hashtag #RUOK to be included in the wider conversation.

Finally, follow this link for more information on 10 September: World Suicide Prevention Day

 

http://www.samaritans.org/wspd

Goals 2014: How To Be #Mindful And Confident Before Tackling A Change #Goal

Tai Chi Exercise

What New Challenge Will You Take This Week? Picture credit The Tai Chi Club on Morguefile

I’ve recently been posting on LinkedIn and elsewhere about the feel-good benefits of taking action. Action can mean getting an enterprise of the ground, or encouraging others to make effective use of your time

If you follow the links you will see the context for those posts is making the most of yourself in the world of work. However, in the real world work and life co-exist. Making any kind of change in one part of your life opens up the possibility of a positive outcome in the other.

Starting an exciting new work project adds spice to your social life. Getting people to respect your time at work increases your confidence generally. Having a reserve of confidence to draw on helps you prepare, step forward and change.

How Do You Know That You Are Ready To Change?

Being mindful about your inner state and your readiness to change something significant in your life involves knowing what is in both your head and your heart. Procrastinating about change goals is understandable Taking action on a change goal involves accepting the discomfort you will experience.

Starting a social or commercial enterprise involves making connections; sharing your ideas; overcoming problems; being resilient. It is not a head-based issue. Your heart is involved too. The big question is: How does the idea of changing your situation make you feel? What small, but important, step can you take to increase your confidence levels?

What’s Confidence Got To Do With It?

Like I said you need a reserve of confidence to call on to help you picture your success. You won’t take the first step and plan – let alone undertake – effective action without it. Some people are too low on reserves of confidence to make the first step. Their life goals are low priority items. Their goals lie low on the list, behind the day to day pressures of an agenda topped by paying the bills.

If those pressures persist for long enough they can contribute to health problems. Those problems can escalate to an extent that they become mental health issues (according to the Mental Health Foundation 1 in 4 of us will have a problem like this in the course of the year)

Tackling Mental Health

Great then to see that Sport England is directing £2m ($3.2m or 2.5m Euros) into improving the lives of people with mental health problems.

Their project director (a former boss of mine) Mike Diaper says:

There is compelling evidence that participation in sport and physical activity has a positive influence on mental wellbeing and mental illness. This includes enhancing day-to-day moods, reducing the impact of stress and enhancing self-esteem”.

Obviously there is a long way between under-confidence and serious health conditions like anxiety. I’m just glad some work is being done on these debilitating issues.

How Do You Ensure You Are Taking Good Care of Your Health?

What’s your secret for remaining healthy under the pressure of your personal and working life? If you are preparing to make a major change in your life how do you build up your energy reserves?

  • Is it by ensuring you eat healthily and sleep well?
  • Do you make time for your weekly mind and body work out of Tai Chi?
  • Is your main priority relaxing with your family over the weekend?

Share Your Secrets To Getting Stuff Done

In the pressured world in which we live it is good to know how people maintain their day to day balance. If you are ok sharing your story please add a comment below. You can continue the conversation on Twitter @RogerD_Said too.

Goals 2014: What Can You Do To Improve Your Sense Of #WellBeing ?

Robin Williams

How Are You Taking Care Of Your Own & Others’ Well-Being?

I first came across Robin Williams’ work on the 1970s US tv show Mork & Mindy.  I remember liking the cartoon energy in his performance.  He was larger than life, well my life in the UK anyway.  I was young though, so the subtle side of his work went over my head.  I grew to appreciate the breadth of his talent over the intervening years.

Robin Williams’ death, at 63 years of age, made me cry.  It was shocking.  Shocking in part because he was relatively young, much loved and hugely talented.  Shocking mostly because of the link to mental health.

What Is Your Well-Being Strategy?

You can never tell what mental health challenges someone might be facing.  According to the Mental Health Foundation  1 in 4 of us in the UK will have a problem this year.  These challenges cut across age, class, ethnicity, sexual orientation and other barriers.  Men in particular can end up stoically suffering in silence.  Men’s Health magazine offers a unisex slideshow on actions that result in feeling happier  What is your strategy?

Well-Being Goals For Leaders And Managers

The ordinary pressures of life can have a very hard impact on some people who are already feeling vulnerable.  The concepts of austerity and more-for-less are permanent features of the employment landscape now.  What impact do they have on your sense of well-being?

As the Men’s Health slideshow suggests being mindful of our own mental-health needs and taking action is important within the workplace and outside of it.

Leaders and managers also have an important role to play in contributing to healthier workplace outcomes.  They can create an authentic workplace culture which supports staff engagement; a sub-set of which is well-being.

As a large UK employer the Civil Service outlines their engagement strategy here for their 463,000 plus members of staff and millions of customers.

Staff in any sized organisation are more confident if they know that their bosses support their well-being as they are seen as people, not just workers.  There is a relationship between confidence, resilience and productivity.  Confident leaders make it possible for colleagues to have conversations about managing workplace pressures more effectively.  What are your leaders doing to facilitate those conversations?

How Do You Help Others Through Their Day?

Finally, I like the idea of positively influencing others.  One of my goals is to treat others as I wish to be treated myself.  Being thoughtful towards others feels good.  Plus, it might lighten the strain on anyone who is having a tough day.  How do you help the important people in your life manage the pressures in their life?

Here are 10 quotes courtesy of Mashable  related to Mr Williams.  I hope you find them inspiring.  Feel free to share this post, comment below and keep the discussion going @RogerD_Said

Rest in Peace Robin.

Goals 2014: Who Do You Thank When You Are Being #Mindful?

Saying Thank You

Mindfulness And The Value Of Saying Thank You

It is a busy world and you are bombarded by emails, texts, meeting requests and dozens of people claiming your time. It can be hard to make time to stop and think about the people who make your day a bit easier.  In fact when someone goes out of their way to make your goals easier to accomplish, their efforts can slip by unrecognised.

However, being mindful* and celebrating that assistance can trigger leadership action on your part, which helps to establish a virtuous cycle: good team work leads to positive client feedback; your leadership is shown to reflect an authentic understanding of what good work by colleagues looks like; your clients keep getting more examples of that good work.

(*Mark Williams and Danny Penman’s practical guide to ‘Mindfulness’, published in 2011, might be one for you to look at, if you want to learn more).

What Are Your Options For Showing Your Appreciation?

If you do recognise others’ contribution to your success there are so many options available to you, to show your appreciation, that choosing the right one can be a challenge.

  • In the world beyond work I’m sure that a Father’s Day gift, or call, would go down well today.
  • If you know someone who has made a contribution to civil society in the UK you can recommend them for an award in the Queen’s Birthday, or New Year’s Honours List.
  • Simply remembering someone’s birthday or anniversary can make their day too. So can an unexpected card showing your appreciation for something they did (like the one in the illustration above, which I just got from a client. It definitely put a smile on my face).

Here Are Some Questions For Your Consideration

If making time for reflection, and being more mindful, is one of your health goals here are some questions you might want to consider:

  • How often in your busy schedule do you pause, and think of ways to show your appreciation of others’ efforts?
  • How far do you go beyond saying ‘thank you’ when you do so?
  • How will you show your appreciation for outstanding service to a colleague, friend or family member in the next 7 days?

Good luck with the week ahead of you. Let me know how you get on (and do respond today or tomorrow to my recent post on equality and diversity).

Feel free to look at the further ideas relating to your work and life goals in the Archive section here, on Facebook and Google+ too.  Or if you are a Linkedin user you can visit View Roger Dennison’s profile