How To Take A Step Forward On #InternationalMensDay

I had a really interesting conversation at a networking event earlier this week.

A woman guest and I were talking about the all the different ways it is possible to be of service and to ask for support so you can improve. Here’s a big generalisation that I brought to our discussion:

Women and men have different ideas about seeking support while they tackle their working day 

Plenty Of Men Aren’t Alpha Males

I went to a Boy’s school, so I grew up knowing a bit about bullying and that some guys held more of the cards than I did (and weren’t shy about pointing that out).

For every Alpha male out there you will find plenty of ordinary guys who are trying to do the best they can with what they have got.

Where many women will reach out and work effectively together to do more than ‘get by’, many men will try to go it alone, toughing it out in isolation, without showing any vulnerability.

Perhaps (at the extreme end of the scale) that is part of the reason why three times as many men take their own lives, as compared to women.

Men Can Take Action

Keeping calm and carrying on only highlights the distance some men maintain between their inner world and the effective support networks they can tap into. 

If there is truth in the men-go-it-alone generalisation then men will keep losing out. They would be better off making time to be thoughtful, working out how they need to grow and taking action to improve their situation. The alternative is spending more time working and less time:

  • paying attention to their inner growth goals
  • deciding where their boundaries lie, so they don’t end up shortchanging their family, friends and community
  • caring about the impact they have on the people they serve, including their clients, their colleagues and the wider community

Making A Difference

I hope that today (International Men’s Day) someone reading this post will decide to set themselves a goal and take an action which helps to improve their quality of life and benefit their community, team and family too.

Share this post with someone for whom it will make a difference today or tomorrow (and comment below if it resonates with you).

Finally, if you want FREE Downloadable information to start the improvement wheels turning for yourself, or a man in your life, please visit
https://experienceyourlife.coachesconsole.com/   

Goals 2014: Three Questions About The Health Of Your Relationship

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Chocolates Show You Care

Happy Valentine’s Day: It’s the one day you have a good reason to show you value your main relationship.  Have you opted for chocolates, flowers, or wine?

Speaking of your relationship, what’s your goal beyond today?  What else are you doing to keep improving the quality of that relationship, tomorrow and the next day?  In particular how will you:

  • Demonstrate your long-term commitment to the relationship?
  • Share your authentic self within it?
  • Deepen the element of trust the relationship depends upon?

It is worth having a action plan to maintain the health of this key part of your life.  In that way you remind yourself that you value the well-being of your every part of your life: from your main relationship, to your well-being at work, to the health of your finances.

Three Steps Toward Happiness

Can Money Make You Happy? (c) R Dennison July 2013

Can Money Make You Happy? (c) R Dennison July 2013

Actively pursuing a goal can contribute towards personal happiness, although gathering a pile of money might not be enough to put a smile on one’s face.

The BBC  reports that recent research, led by Professor Ruut Veenhoven from Rotterdam University, indicates that:

“In order to lead a happy life, a rewarding life, you need to be active, … So involvement is more important to happiness than knowing the why, why we are here”

The top three indicators that you are likely to be happy include being:

  • actively engaged in politics
  • active in work and in your free time

So perhaps having a goal which regularly engages personal, or professional, energies helps move individuals one step closer to happiness.

There is more information in the link below about the research (and a list of the top ten happiest nations).

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-23097143