A Few Thoughts For #Carersweek

Taking Care Of Someone Else Means Taking Care Of Yourself First – Picture credit Madison Inouye on Pexels.com

It has been another tough year.

The Coronavirus is still knocking people for six.  

Relatives and friends looking after loved ones are feeling invisible and under-valued.

For instance, research shows more than 7 out 10 UK carers haven’t practiced self-care and had a break in 12 months (a link to the report is below).

Which mean thousands of people are exhausted. Which means tired relatives struggling to focus on caring for a loved one. Which leaves the cared for person with less than the full support they need.

Vaccination is making a difference. Society may look different before too long.

Hopefully, by June 2022, better support will be offered to carers and carers will be more visible and valued. If so, the cared for will feel the benefit.

‘Breaks or breakdown’, Carers Week 2021 report – Carers UK

Picture credit Madison Inouye on Pexels.com

3 Steps Toward Greater #Happiness In #CarersWeek

A Selection of fruit

Do Your Goals Include Diet, Exercise And Mindfulness?

It is (sort of) the middle of the year. Here comes an awkward question: what kind of a year has it been so far?

You’ve undertaken plenty of caring of course. Those you care for have benefited from your time. How often though have you taken care of yourself?

When you look back at the personal growth or self leadership goals you set yourself six months ago, how many have you completed? What do the incomplete ones have in common? Is there a goal which is completely untouched?

Are You Sometimes Fearful of Putting Yourself First?

What is keeping you from tackling that untouched goal you wrote down six months ago? Are you afraid of making a positive change for yourself? When you practice some mindfulness and look at what is happening in your body how do you feel? Would you feel disloyal if you spent some time on yourself?

3 Happiness Solutions Suggested By Carers 

I was privileged last Carers Week to lead a session looking at how we can take simple steps to improve our levels of Happiness.

As we rush around looking out for others we recognised the value of meeting our own needs. We focused on the low cost or free solutions which could help us provide for others in a better way, whilst meeting our own needs.

My part of the day captured several practical ideas for self care. Amongst other views one attendee said:

I enjoy cooking for my family

They were sharing the idea that providing good food for their loved ones helped them feel good.

Another person in the room felt energised by spending some personal time on exercise. They commented:

Going to the Gym makes me Happy!

Someone else was in reflective mood and noted that they felt better when surrounded by greenery:

Being outdoors in nature makes me smile

How Do You Care For Yourself?

How does your diet, exercise and leisure plan help you care better and manage your own well-being? How much positive feedback do you get from those for whom you care? What other suggestions do you have for making caring more manageable?

Thank you for reading this post. Feel free to share your well-being ideas in the comments and help other people with their day. If you have found this post helpful you can Share and Like it too. Visit the Members tab to sign up for free information about taking action on your goals.

Live More Happily And Empathically After #Internationalmenshealthweek

Happiness And Empathy Build A More Caring World

Happiness And Empathy Help Build Well Being

You might know that we are most of the way through International Men’s Health Week (13 to 19 June).

The 2016 theme is setting goals and taking action to reduce the stresses in your life. Being a happier man is one of the positive results.

A week ago, when I started planning what to post here about IMHW I was creating the sort of ‘How To’ information which could lead to less stressful living. It helps that  7 days ago I was also creating visuals, like the one above, as part of a Carers Week workshop on Experiencing Greater Happiness..

The workshop highlighted the close relationship between happiness and empathy, well-being Mindfulness and other healthier living ideas.

As I say that was the content I had planned.

Something changed over the weekend though.

What Can Happen When Empathy Is Missing?

Over the weekend a mentally troubled man decided to drive for an hour across Florida from his home to his destination and commit mass murder. This wasn’t a spur of the moment thing. He had armed himself with an assault rifle and a handgun.

His crime scene was the Pulse Bar (a venue which serves Orlando’s ethnically  diverse Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Trans and progressive straight communities). On the weekend it was full of people living life, enjoying liberty and pursuing happiness. Free to do so during Pride Month or any other time.

The shooter took advantage of that freedom.

He shot his way in, stalking the people he didn’t cut down immediately and holding some hostage. Ultimately he killed 49 people. His spree also led to 53 more clubbers being hospitalised.

Now every partner, sibling, parent and friend of the dead and injured will spend the rest of their lives living with the pain he inflicted.

How Men Can Use Empathy

A few days has made a big difference to my sense of what ‘men’s health’ means.

From wanting to talk about the simple goal of happiness for men I end up talking about big ideas like empathy, well-being, connection and care.

We need to work on solutions for men – straight, bi, gay, queer, questioning men – so that we are better able to manage our inner state and our relationships with the world.

In the days ahead it is important we do what we can to connect to and care for each other a bit more than usual.

We can all use empathy to better understand what is happening in other people’s lives and how they might be feeling.

In particular, if you feel there is someone close to you who seems overwhelmed take time to check in with him. That’s really important since (Breaking News) men don’t always volunteer information about ‘feelings’.

So fellas, try empathy. Simply asking your mate, your brother, your partner ‘How Are You’, then listening to the tone of the answer and supporting them through tough times can make all the difference.

How Will You Make A Difference?

Thanks for reading this post on the challenges facing men. How will you act differently now? As I finalised these words the discussion over the murder of British Parliamentarian Jo Cox – and the disconnected background of the suspect – is ringing in my ears.

Something has to change.

Feel free to share this post with anyone who would find it useful. I am on Twitter @RogerD_Said if you want to comment on the themes I mentioned.