4 Steps To Help You Reach Your New Year #Goals

Runners In A Street Race

Get On The Road To Your Next Goal (Picture Credit Morguefile.Com)

Happy New Year!

You are not along if you feel daunted by the reality of more than 360 days in your 2018 planner.

It is possible to change the course of your life in that time. Here 4 steps to get you moving toward your next goal.

First, get specific about the area you are going to work on. Chances are, like the rest of us, you have a bunch of areas you would like to tackle. Many people think about setting goals regarding Health, Finances or Work for instance.

Why not write down all of the key themes running through your life at the moment. Score your satisfaction with each one out of 10. Whatever area scores 6 or less would be a good place for goal setting (if there are several tied in that group choose the one that feels most like it needs your attention).

Let’s suppose you want to enjoy a higher standard of health by running regularly, like a former coaching client of mine used to. He identified a positive benefit to following his goal (he could reconnect with running buddies and raise money for charity by taking part in an event later in the year).

Second, list the resources you can already access to tackle your goal. Resources include the people you know, the skills, you have, the wider knowledge you can tap into.

Set some boundaries / milestones up in your planner. Use it to show what you will do to work on your goal, with whose help and when. This visualisation will help you focus.

Third, run a reality check. Given the pressures on his average week it wasn’t  always practical for  my client to train more than once a week. This meant he had to adjust his plan so as to make the progress he wanted to achieve, without feeling his ultimate goal was unreachable.

Fourth, celebrate each improvement made along the way. We can sometimes care so much about crossing the finishing line that we downplay our improved performance at each stage.

Thank you for reading this initial 2018 post. Leave a comment, Like or Share if it has helped you so you can help others. I’m interested in what you have to say and others will be too.

Until next time, have a great day.


3 Steps Towards More Success With Your #Goals And #Wellbeing

Congratulations if you have started a new project recently. The run up to Christmas is the time of year when people take a deep breath and say ‘Yes!’ to a University course, an Evening Class, or other life-changing challenge.

That bold investment of time, money and optimism involves:

  • Paying regular attention to your new goal
  • Setting boundaries so your time is well spent and you connect to supportive people
  • Caring about the quality of your outputs as you reach your next milestone

What About People Who Don’t Have New Goals?

It is OK not to pursue new goals. Sometimes caring for others and looking after yourself is enough. Although, having said that, there is always time for goal setting unless everything is perfect in the key areas of life which are important to most of us.

What Are The 3 Steps?

The 3 steps to greater well-being involve Goal-Setting, Taking Action, Connecting to Others who want to improve their situation concerning:

  • Fun
  • Health
  • Money
  • Relationships
  • Work

The next time you are relaxing over a cup of coffee, take the time to do a quick exercise on paper. Using the five headings above decide what score you give yourself out of 10 in each area.

Does one area stand out in the 1 to 5 range? How would it feel to set a goal and start improving that area?

What would you feel like in six months, to be surrounded by other happy, successful people who are feeling 8 out of 10 about life, just like you?

What Is Your Next Action?

If you want to take your first step toward fulfilment and well-being take a look at the short video. It highlights 3 key ideas central to getting started on tackling your goals.

Remember, there are more free resources in the Members’ Area which you can access too. Don’t forget to Like and Share this post to help others get started on their way to a more fulfilling life.

Good Luck!

Live More Happily And Empathically After #Internationalmenshealthweek

Happiness And Empathy Build A More Caring World

Happiness And Empathy Help Build Well Being

You might know that we are most of the way through International Men’s Health Week (13 to 19 June).

The 2016 theme is setting goals and taking action to reduce the stresses in your life. Being a happier man is one of the positive results.

A week ago, when I started planning what to post here about IMHW I was creating the sort of ‘How To’ information which could lead to less stressful living. It helps that  7 days ago I was also creating visuals, like the one above, as part of a Carers Week workshop on Experiencing Greater Happiness..

The workshop highlighted the close relationship between happiness and empathy, well-being Mindfulness and other healthier living ideas.

As I say that was the content I had planned.

Something changed over the weekend though.

What Can Happen When Empathy Is Missing?

Over the weekend a mentally troubled man decided to drive for an hour across Florida from his home to his destination and commit mass murder. This wasn’t a spur of the moment thing. He had armed himself with an assault rifle and a handgun.

His crime scene was the Pulse Bar (a venue which serves Orlando’s ethnically  diverse Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Trans and progressive straight communities). On the weekend it was full of people living life, enjoying liberty and pursuing happiness. Free to do so during Pride Month or any other time.

The shooter took advantage of that freedom.

He shot his way in, stalking the people he didn’t cut down immediately and holding some hostage. Ultimately he killed 49 people. His spree also led to 53 more clubbers being hospitalised.

Now every partner, sibling, parent and friend of the dead and injured will spend the rest of their lives living with the pain he inflicted.

How Men Can Use Empathy

A few days has made a big difference to my sense of what ‘men’s health’ means.

From wanting to talk about the simple goal of happiness for men I end up talking about big ideas like empathy, well-being, connection and care.

We need to work on solutions for men – straight, bi, gay, queer, questioning men – so that we are better able to manage our inner state and our relationships with the world.

In the days ahead it is important we do what we can to connect to and care for each other a bit more than usual.

We can all use empathy to better understand what is happening in other people’s lives and how they might be feeling.

In particular, if you feel there is someone close to you who seems overwhelmed take time to check in with him. That’s really important since (Breaking News) men don’t always volunteer information about ‘feelings’.

So fellas, try empathy. Simply asking your mate, your brother, your partner ‘How Are You’, then listening to the tone of the answer and supporting them through tough times can make all the difference.

How Will You Make A Difference?

Thanks for reading this post on the challenges facing men. How will you act differently now? As I finalised these words the discussion over the murder of British Parliamentarian Jo Cox – and the disconnected background of the suspect – is ringing in my ears.

Something has to change.

Feel free to share this post with anyone who would find it useful. I am on Twitter @RogerD_Said if you want to comment on the themes I mentioned.


4 Self Care Strategies Which Also Help Others Achieve Their #Goals

You Need To Feel Good To Use These Resources Well

You Need To Feel Good To Use These Resources Well

If you are a coach, a team leader, or a motivator you are used to helping others tackle their goals. With the start of 2016 close by where are you on the scale which starts in Excitement and ends in Overwhelming Anxiety?

We can’t all be upbeat 24/7. Sometimes our inner critical voice interrupts our excitement. We are developing into a new area and then BAM! up comes a story from the past where things didn’t go as planned.

Your Stories Have Value

I have supported enough people engaged in professional development as coaches etc to have heard a lot of stories about 2015’s challenges. Building up knowledge, likability and trust is hard work.

To be fair you also hear a lot of optimism about the new opportunities coming in 2016 and how learning lessons from the past can help shape the future.

Self Care Comes First

From what I have heard (and experienced) it makes sense to have a healthy balance between the positive energy you share with others and the wisdom you tap into from your own stories.

Speaking at London’s Business Show recently Britain’s number 1 motivational speaker Brad Burton made a brilliant point about the balance between useful stories and achieving results for others.

Reflecting on his own efforts to get the balance right over the years he said

Your story starts now. Pay attention to caring for yourself, your family and your business.

Your business goal might be achieving good results in your 9 to 5; enjoying success in your part time startup gig; or organising a knockout Christmas social for 100 people. Either way having a healthy balance helps produce good results for others and a feeling of satisfaction for you.

Inspired by Brad here are 4 self care strategies to reduce overwhelm, which you can start using today.

  1. Pay attention to the quality of your contributions – family, colleagues and customers appreciate your efforts. If you over do it trying to be active all the time with everyone in your life the quality of what you achieve goes down.  
  2. Respect others’ boundaries and your own – if you have too much on your plate you can’t offer your best self to others. It is ok to set time when you won’t be available because those limits mean you can focus your time on your priorities.
  3. Care about your results within reason – while you recognise that some outcomes don’t call for 100% of your effort (because 80% will still produce good results).
  4. Decide how often you are going to review your needs – setting time to check in with yourself means you remain mindful of your own maintenance / development priorities. That helps you keep a fresh focus when you are supporting others’ development.

Want To Learn More?

Thanks for reading this far. If you have ideas about the value of self care please leave your comments below. Feel free to share the post if you have found it helpful.

If you are ready ready to start 2016 by making positive changes to your professional work which benefits others take a moment and follow this link https://experienceyourlife.coachesconsole.com/

There you will find a FREE tool you can download by clicking the blue button (in exchange for your contact details) which will help you focus your attention on your biggest priority issue. You will start making improvements from there, if you keep taking action.

If you would like to learn more about the support I offer to coaches, thought leaders, inspiring speakers and others please schedule a discovery conversation with me using the calendar function on the right of the page (where it says Click Here).